The more you tell people about your goals, the less likely they are to happen.
Let me explain.
In order to achieve any goal, you need to take certain steps and do some work.
A LOT OF WORK.
Ideally, you’re not satisfied until you’ve actually done the work.
When you tell someone what you’re trying to achieve, and they acknowledge it, your mind mistakes the talking for the doing.
This is a psychological phenomenon called “social reality”, where the mind gets tricked into feeling like the work is already done.
And since you felt that satisfaction, it makes you less likely to actually do the work necessary to reach that goal.
Chances are, you’ll move on to another goal, which is doomed to live as short as the initial goal since you can’t help but talk about it.
It doesn’t mean that you can’t achieve them anymore, but it adds to the list of things that will try to drag you down.
And trust me, it’s a long list and you don’t need more of those things to spare.
So then, what should you do?
Let’s find out.
The first thing you need to do is to SHUT YOUR MOUTH.
Resist the temptation to announce your goal, and delay the gratification that social acknowledgement brings.
Stop seeking others’ approval and caring about what they think.
Instead, create an ideal version of yourself in your mind, and obsess over that person’s approval.
This is your future self who has achieved the goal you set, looking back on your current actions and praying that you commit.
This mental shift allows you to break free from the control others have over your actions and decisions.
Now, even if you don’t proactively mention it, people will ask you what you’ve been up to and try to learn about your plans, progress and challenges.
Resist the urge to show it off.
Keep your plans to yourself.
Do not diminish their power to satisfy others.
If you have to say something, go with an understatement like “I’m reading about this thing, but there’s a lot to learn and I don’t really have much to share yet.”
And flip the conversation back to them.
People love talking about themselves, so you’ll successfully have dodged the interrogation.
Now that you’ve properly disappeared, what do you do in the dark?
Well, it’s time to get to work.
You need to define the actual steps that will help you achieve your goal.
Let’s take the example of growing a YouTube channel.
If you want to see your channel grow in the next 6 months, you need to be posting at least 1 high quality video every week.
If you want to make a high quality video, you need to start by actually making a video.
It doesn’t matter if it’s terrible, and it is going to be terrible, but you will have a minimum viable product in your hands.
If you don’t cringe when you watch one of your videos from the past month, you’re not doing it fast enough.
We’ll get back to that, but first, the ingredients.
You need to have an idea, learn how to write a decent script covering that idea, how to add a voiceover, and how to put them together in a video.
Once you have the video, you need to package it with a title and thumbnail, and add a description to explain what it is about.
This is essentially all you need to create and publish a YouTube video.
Once you write down all the steps that you can think of, you move on to the next phase, which is to come up with a strategic plan to actually take those steps.
You pull up your calendar, and very intentionally allocate time for all the steps that you wrote down.
On Monday, you do your ideation and come up with a video title.
On Tuesday, you start scripting your video.
On Wednesday, you finish your script and do the voiceover.
On Thursday, you edit the first half of your video.
On Friday, you edit the second half and create your thumbnail.
On Saturday, you write a brief description, and post your video.
This kind of granularity will help you stay consistent, which is the most important thing you need to do if you want to reach your goal, whatever your goal is.
Once you start doing the work day in and day out, you will see a rapid improvement in your basic skills, and find yourself looking for ways to make your videos more interesting to watch.
You will start understanding what’s more important, how you can play it more strategically, and how to get better returns for your efforts.
You will be able to identify the 20% of work that accounts for 80% of the results you get.
And here comes the next step: Iterate.
You will adjust your plan according to your learnings, allocating more time to the things that used to be just an afterthought such as your thumbnail, or finding a good idea that your audience actually wants to watch.
Now on Monday, you do way more research to come up with a video idea, and the best possible title.
You’re able to do this, because you took the first step into the unknown, created your channel, started posting videos and received a lot of feedback.
Now you know that your great editing skills and valuable script doesn’t matter if no one cares about your topic in the first place.
You spare the entire Tuesday to design a thumbnail that will have the viewer stop scrolling as soon as they see it, and give them no choice but to click on your video.
You’re able to do this, because now you’re confident that more people will watch and enjoy your video only if you can get them to click on it, and know that none of the hard work matters without this piece of the puzzle.
On Wednesday, you start scripting with a much more structured approach.
Instead of just jotting down what comes to your mind, you individually focus on the hooks, ending and the story to engage your viewers and keep them watching.
Because now you know that your intro is vital to keep the viewers watching and have your video recommended by the algorithm.
On Thursday, you finish scripting and start editing your video. Your editing is getting better and you start finding your style.
On Friday, you finish editing and start drafting a well-thought-out description that is good for your SEO rather than just getting it out of the way, because now you know how important it is to help the right audience find your video.
On Saturday, you review everything, finish the remaining tasks like subtitles and end screens, and post your video.
As you keep iterating on the feedback you receive, you discover new ways to improve your progress even more, and make the second version of your calendar redundant.
There will be a third, fourth, and fifth version; and before you know, you’ll have already mastered YouTube and reached your goal.
What now, though?
What are you supposed to do?
You’ve disappeared, worked relentlessly on your goal, and reached it.
Now you’re actually qualified to accept the acknowledgments from others, and feel great about doing something with your life.
You’ll need to reappear to do that and walk the red carpet.
You’ll need to take pride in what you did, and maybe even brag a little bit.
The funny thing is, you’ll probably not want to.
The transformation you just went through will bring a sense of peace and fulfillment that surpasses the need for external validation.
You’ll find yourself continuing to push for greater goals while remaining in the shadows, content with the new life you’ve built.
And that’s what makes it so magical.
So do it.
Start today.
Your future self is begging you.
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